Men (and women) I thank you again for coming back to read this blog. I appreciate all of your support and I pray you continue to keep reading. This time I would like to take a different approach on this blog. I want to raise the question why men [and women] cannot stand alone? Why do we feel if we have a chick (excuse the expression ladies, no offense) under us, with us, or whatever the expression is nowadays we are not cool or aren't as successful? I will write briefly on this topic but please leave comments about this one. I would like you to explain your struggle with this whether it was in the past or it's still a struggle.
My first thought, men we are going by what we see. If daddy or your best friend or your uncle or even better, the entertainment world shows you women as the "complete assets" then it's a must you need to have it too. Now, I'll be the first to say I love women; they are some interesting but beautiful creatures of God. But do you have to have a lady when you are not a man; I don't really think it is the best idea. Women push you and back you up. They help support the man you to make you a better man, much like this blog I am writing. But what can a woman push and support when you're lazy, no manners, no assertiveness to fulfill your ideas as something concrete, or even no education? I'm sorry but if you don't have the requirements then you need to stand alone.
My next thought is a common answer; searching for love in the wrong place. Now as a black man I understand men to be all about food and sex. I find it true in most cases but what has bothered me for years are why is getting a lady such a competition? Have your fun sure but why is it such a game? We do all these things to impress them to just get one or two things from them? Don't you want ALL of what a woman can offer? What she can give? I am firm about this. I am talking about a woman. Not a girl! A girl is someone still growing into a woman. You have to decipher this as she does with you; are you a boy or a man? I feel this need to want to be with a woman whether it's for sex, she cooking you meals like she owns a restaurant, or whatever reason you live and die by is a waste of time if it's not for the reasons God made her. Now if you have an understanding and agreed to certain terms equally then good for you; be careful though. That's not an easy situation either.
Love is fully dressed, intelligent, fun, disciplined, and refined. If you are not giving yourself some of these specific characteristics then you're not looking for love. You're looking for a temp job to hold you over because you cannot allow yourself to be alone. Again, if you're young have your fun. If you're an adult please feed yourself love and love will find you. No need to be in a relationship just to be in it.
I want to encourage you, my brother, and even sister…please look at being alone as a moment not a lifetime. Think of standing alone as being whole. Think of standing alone as a tree of life. Standing alone is one of the wonderful joys of life or at least it has been for me. As you have to learn someone else to be seriously involved with them you have to become just as involved with yourself. Spend qt with yourself. By doing this it helps elevate the struggle of today's typical relationships; HELL! I don't say this loosely and excuse the language but understand how much pressure you take off yourself as a man when you know what you want when you have the HD quality of being a man.
I encourage you to understand who you are. If you have reached a point in your life where "running game" on women (which is really just running game on yourself) is getting old and you are truly ready to stop, try standing alone. If you still enjoy standing with someone but enjoy the unnecessary struggles because you and/or your significant other cannot stand alone. Let me know how it turns out. I'm open to hear what I am missing.
Until next time. Peace and love.
